On letting life surprise you.
Show Notes - Journal Jam #7
Dear friends,
Thank you to the beautiful crew who joined us for Journal Jam last Sunday. I was surprised by how much I enjoyed journaling on this month's topic - surprise.
To inspire your own self reflection this month, here's some nuggets of insight and journaling prompts. As always, it's a joy to discuss, share and hold space with you all. I love this community ❤️
Let life surprise you
So often in life, we have no idea what’s around the corner. Surprise interrupts the stable ground we thought we were standing on. In my experience, the hardest part of surprise is letting go of prior expectations. In these moments, life asks us to assume the observer’s seat, to roll with the punches and see what unfolds without manipulating or resisting what’s happening. That means accepting failure and disappointment as equally as accepting the hidden blessings and unexpected opportunities life throws our way. In fact, what unfurls after a shock is often grounds for hope, agency, wonder, delight and awe.
“Leave the door open for the unknown, the door into the dark. That’s where the most important things come from, where you yourself came from, and where you will go.” Rebecca Solnit
As we reflected on our encounters with the unexpected, my sense of trust in the world (and myself) was restored. Surprise is what makes life worth living. I walked away feeling energised and confident as we realised how resilient, adaptable and flexible we truly are. In the face of my dad’s advanced cancer diagnosis this has been incredibly reassuring. Life is unexpected, but that’s the beauty of it. We’re born for this world and its many surprises.
What's on the other side of surprise?
The magic of surprise is that it interrupts our comfortable assumptions. When we're shocked or proven wrong, a space is created in which we can step back and watch life with an expanded view. Often arriving in a "moment of drama" as Felix put it, surprise is there to challenge our expectations, widen our limitations and expand our sense of possibility. It's an equally thrilling and terrifying terrain. This begs the question, where could a healthy dose of surprise be helpful? For me, it's the places where my heart is rigid or where I think I know it all. What about you?
Cooperating with chance
Does surprise find us? Can we create more surprise in our lives? It's an interesting discussion. As Shruthi said, surprise can't be orchestrated and fixating on desired outcomes will only repel surprise. If we want more magic, delight, novelty and growth, we need to allow ourselves to go with the flow and approach life with flexibility, curiosity and openness. At the same time, Felix noted that surprise tends to find you when you've put your chips on the table, taken a chance or set something new in motion. We agreed the truth probably lies somewhere in between. I find surprise often lingers in the space where chance, risk and opportunity meet flexible expectations. In that vein, when surprise finds us as a disappointment, perhaps we can see it as an indication that we're living a full, robust, juicy life in which we've got something to lose?
Journaling prompts for this month:
Think of a time when you were pleasantly surprised. What did you learn from the experience?
What’s the relationship between surprise and control?
What’s the opposite of surprise?
Is surprise always immediate? Can surprise manifest over longer stretches of time?
Where could a healthy dose of surprise be helpful in your life?
Something special
One of the best parts of Journal Jam is holding space for people to show up as their most authentic selves. Milhara truly embodied this as she read a beautiful, goosebump-inducing passage from her journal. She wrote this after a moment of clarity on a recent meditation retreat. We could all relate (or maybe aspire) to her sense of arriving within herself and "giving everything space to just be and exist". There is such power in sharing our inner experiences with the world.
Have a wonderful month ahead everyone, thank you for being a part of this community!
With love,
Alex